Noe Valley Voice April 2001

Energy Hints from Mr. Gas

With Noe Valley facing serious power shortages, Mr. Gas has gathered several tips to help neighborhood residents conserve:

* Set the furnace thermostat to "off," and jump up and down.

* Wash only the parts of things that can actually be seen.

* Collect rainwater in saucepans and heat it when the sun comes out.

* Plug gaps around pipes and ducts with copies of the Examiner.

* Use low-wattage kleig lights when needed.

* Close the drapes at night to avoid an indecent exposure arrest.

* If you have a fireplace, you can burn your old utility bills.